8 actionable steps to Overcoming Postpartum Depression and Anxiety that you can start right now
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When I was pregnant with my first child, I read all the books about what to expect after giving birth. I knew that postpartum depression (PPD) and anxiety (PPA) were common, but I never imagined that I would suffer from them. Unfortunately, I did and I had to figure out how to work through it. After giving birth, I felt overwhelmed and isolated, although I had great support systems. The only thing that helped me get through it was exercise and a healthy diet, which took time and major changes. In this blog post, I want to share my story and offer some advice for others who are struggling with PPD or anxiety.
If you are a new mom and feeling anything less than joyful about this new era, know that you are not alone. According to Postpartum Support International, 1 in 7 women will experience PPD. And while it’s normal to feel some anxiety after having a baby, 1 in 10 women will suffer from postpartum anxiety (PPA).
PPD and PPA can happen to any mom, regardless of age, race, or socioeconomic status. I’ve experienced it twice after the birth of each of my daughters. And while it was incredibly difficult to get through, I did it—and so can you.
Here are 8 things that helped me overcome my symptoms with PPD and PPA.
Exercise (move just 5-10 minutes at a time)
Dr. John Ratey wrote a book titled, Spark. I wish I could remember how I stumbled upon this book, but I am so grateful that I did. I initially began reading this book because it discussed the connection between exercise and student's grades and overall performance in high school. At the time I started reading this I was in the midst of getting my Masters Degree in School Counseling. What I didn't realize was that this book was going to help be the catalyst for me to overcome my undiagnosed PPD.
In his book, Dr. Ratey talks about how exercise boosts our brain power. He states that, "Exercise is the single most powerful tool you have to optimize your brain function." (Ratey, 2008, p. 16). As a new mom, this was something I desperately needed. My brain felt like mush and doing anything besides surviving felt impossible. But, I decided to give it a try. I started slow, just going on walks around my neighborhood with the stroller. Then, I began adding in some at home workouts that I found on YouTube. And finally, I joined a gym and started taking some group fitness classes.
“Exercise is the single most powerful tool you have to optimize your brain function.”
In addition to the physical benefits that exercise provides it also helped clear my brain fog. I was happier, less cranky and ready for whatever the day would throw at me. After my first baby, I was so sleep deprived that the thought of working out made me want to cry. But, I forced myself to get up and do something active every day, even if it was just a walk around the block.
Exercising after having a baby can have numerous benefits for new mothers. Firstly, regular exercise can help new moms lose the weight they gained during pregnancy (but take it slow, there is not rush) which is a common concern for many women. Additionally, exercise can help improve mood and reduce symptoms of postpartum depression. Exercise also provides an opportunity for new moms to take some time for themselves and focus on their own well-being, which can be especially important during a time when so much attention is focused on the new baby. Furthermore, exercise can help improve overall physical health, including cardiovascular health and strength, which can be important for carrying and caring for a growing baby. However, it is important to consult with a healthcare provider before starting any new exercise routine after having a baby, as each woman's postpartum recovery may differ.
Nutrition
I don't know about you, but sweets are my W E A K N E S S. Getting my nutrition to where it needed to be was my biggest feat. I started by cutting out processed foods and eating more whole foods. I also made sure I was getting enough protein and healthy fats. My favorite protein powder is Just Ingredients and I love all of their flavors and ingredients. This was such an easy way to incorporate more protein into my diet and drink on the go.
Within a few weeks, I noticed a dramatic difference in my overall mood and energy levels. Now, I make sure to exercise and eat well every day so that I can be the best mom possible for my kids. I can tell a huge difference in my mood (for the worse) when I start to eat more junk and less whole foods. Recently, I have also been trying to cut out gluten after reading Grain Brain by Dr. Perlmutter. This has been a difficult task, as I am trying to cut out gluten for my whole family now and my girls love some mac-n-cheese . When I can successfully stay away from gluten I do notice an improvement in my mood. The saying, "you are what you eat" proves itself to be true. The more junk I eat the more my brain feels like junk. The better I eat, the better my brain feels.
“The more junk I eat, the more my brain feels like junk.”
Improving nutrition has many benefits for the body, including improving mood and mental health. When we eat a healthy and balanced diet, we are providing our bodies with the essential nutrients it needs to function properly. This includes nutrients like omega-3 fatty acids, B vitamins, and minerals like magnesium and zinc, which are all important for brain health and mood regulation.
Research has shown that a diet high in processed foods and sugar can increase the risk of depression and anxiety. On the other hand, a diet rich in whole foods like fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins has been found to have a positive effect on mood. This is because these foods provide the necessary nutrients to support brain function and the production of neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine, which are important for regulating mood.
Improving nutrition can also have a positive impact on other aspects of our health, like improving energy levels, reducing inflammation, and improving sleep quality, which can all contribute to better mood and mental health. So, if you're looking to improve your mood and overall well-being, start by making small changes to your diet, such as adding more fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins, while reducing your intake of processed foods and sugar. Check out these meal plans to help assist you in making healthier food choices.
Ask for help
I am so fortunate to have an amazing husband who is more than willing to pick up some of the slack around the house when I am feeling overwhelmed. Just knowing that I have someone to help me makes a world of difference. Sometimes all it takes is for me to ask for help and then I feel so much better. It wasn't always this way though. I had to stop and think about what I needed and what was going to help me achieve this. I would be very passive about asking him to do things and get frustrated if he didn't.
After having a baby, it's common for new parents to feel overwhelmed and in need of help. Asking for help can be difficult, but it's important to remember that it's okay to seek assistance during this time. Here are some tips on how to ask for help after having a baby:
Identify your needs: Take some time to think about what you need help with. Do you need someone to cook meals, do laundry, or watch the baby while you take a nap? Once you know what you need, it will be easier to ask for help.
Reach out to family and friends: Don't be afraid to ask your loved ones for help. Most people are happy to lend a hand, but they may not know what you need unless you ask. Be specific about what you need help with and when you need it.
Consider hiring a professional: If you can afford it, hiring a postpartum doula or a house cleaner can be a great way to get some extra help during this time.
Join a support group: There are many support groups for new parents where you can connect with others who are going through the same experience. This can be a great way to get advice and support, and you may even make some new friends.
Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Taking care of a new baby is a big job, and it's important to take care of yourself too.
Find gratitude
Setting aside time to remember the small wins from the day has been so helpful. As the day goes on it is easy to feel like you have not been able to accomplish anything, but taking the time to celebrate the small wins and show gratitude towards them can instantly improve your mood. I try to jot down 10 items that I am grateful for each evening, no matter how big or small they are. My gratitude lists usually include something to do with coffee, my husband picking up an extra chore or doing something super sweet and if my children take exceptional naps or sleep well at night (LOL I find lots of joy in sleeping victories.)
Practicing gratitude is a simple and effective way to improve your overall well-being and happiness. Here are some tips on how to start practicing gratitude:
Keep a gratitude journal: Every day, write down three things you are grateful for. It can be as simple as being grateful for a good cup of coffee or as profound as being thankful for your family and friends. By keeping a gratitude journal, you will start to focus more on the positive aspects of your life.
Express your gratitude: Take the time to express your gratitude to the people in your life. Write a thank-you note, give a compliment, or simply tell someone how much you appreciate them. Not only will this make someone else feel good, but it will also reinforce your own feelings of gratitude.
Practice mindfulness: Take a few minutes each day to sit quietly and focus on the present moment. Notice the sights, sounds, and sensations around you. This will help you to be more present and appreciate the small moments in life.
Remember, practicing gratitude is a habit that takes time to develop. Be patient with yourself and keep at it. Over time, you will start to notice a shift in your mindset and overall happiness.
Speak with your doctor
There is absolutely no shame in needing to take medication to help overcome PPD or PPA. Speaking with your doctor is the first step. You can decide with them what medication would suit you best and how it might affect breastfeeding, etc. After my second, I chose to take the lowest dose of a medication and wanted to make sure I spoke with my doctor about only being on the medication for a short period of time. You cannot wean yourself from the medication as this could cause unwanted side effects. For me, I knew the power of exercise and diet because it was something I had already been studying, but I also knew I needed something to help me get over the hump. I didn't have the motivation or energy to start working out and focusing on my diet until I started taking the medication for a few weeks.
Talking to your doctor is an essential part of maintaining good health. Effective communication with your doctor helps them understand your concerns and provide the right treatment. Here are some tips on how to talk to your doctor:
Be honest: It is important to be honest with your doctor about your symptoms, lifestyle, and any medications or supplements you are taking. This information will help your doctor make an accurate diagnosis and create a treatment plan that works for you.
Ask questions: Don't be afraid to ask questions about your condition, diagnosis, and treatment options. This will help you understand your health better and make informed decisions about your care.
Be clear: Make sure you explain your symptoms and concerns clearly and concisely. This will help your doctor understand your situation and provide the right treatment.
Take notes: It's a good idea to take notes during your appointment so that you can remember important details about your condition and treatment plan.
Follow up: Make sure you follow up with your doctor after your appointment. This will help you stay on track with your treatment plan and ensure that your condition is improving.
Remember, your doctor is there to help you. Effective communication is key to getting the care you need to stay healthy.
I am not a doctor, so always speak with your doctor before starting or changing any medications.
Seek therapy
This one seemed a little more difficult at first because the waitlists in our area to see a licensed mental health professional are insanely long. Because of this, I decided to try TalkSpace. This is an app that connects you to a licensed mental health professional via messaging, talking or video chat. You can choose a plan that works best for you. I chose to use messaging so that I could message my therapist when I was getting my baby to sleep or if my baby fell asleep on me. I didn't have to worry about my kids causing so much ruckus in the background and not being able to find a time that worked for scheduling. I truly think meeting with a therapist in person is the best option, but this could definitely be helpful until you can meet with a therapist that is local to you.
Finding the right therapist can be a daunting task, but it is an important step towards improving your mental health and well-being. Here are some tips to help you find the right therapist for you:
Consider your needs: Think about what you want to get out of therapy and what issues you want to address. This can help you narrow down the type of therapist you need.
Ask for recommendations: Ask your doctor, friends, or family members if they can recommend a therapist. You can also check online directories or professional organizations for therapists in your area.
Check credentials: Make sure the therapist you choose is licensed and has experience treating the issues you want to address. You can check their credentials online or ask them directly.
Schedule a consultation: Many therapists offer a free consultation to see if they are a good fit for you. This can be a good opportunity to ask questions and see if you feel comfortable with them.
Trust your gut: Ultimately, the most important factor in finding the right therapist is feeling comfortable with them. If you don't feel like you can trust them or you don't feel like they understand your needs, it may be time to look for someone else.
Remember, finding the right therapist may take some time and effort, but it is worth it in the long run. Don't be afraid to ask questions and advocate for yourself to ensure you get the care you need.
Do 1 thing for yourself daily (even if it’s small.)
Self care is a hot topic in our society today. It is mostly presented as a luxurious, time consuming activity. I am definitely guilty of comparing my situation to others on social media. So, I would see a new mom going to get regular massages, their nails done, float therapy, weekend getaways, etc. meanwhile I couldn't even manage to meet my basic needs on a daily basis. A shower had become a luxury. This is when I decided that my self care didn't have to look like their's. In my current situation I could only spare about 15-20 minutes of time to myself, so I could read a book, scroll Pinterest and Instagram aimlessly, paint my own nails, take a bath, etc. I needed to change my mindset and realize that one day I would be able to do some more luxurious self care practices, but the situation I was in only allotted for short periods of time alone and that's okay. The best way to make sure you get the self care you need is to schedule it, write it down and make no exceptions. Ask your partner, friend or family member to help you with the kids so you can have at least 15-20 minutes to yourself each day. I've seen the quote numerous times, as I am sure you have to, "you cannot pour from an empty cup." Your kids need you and they need the best version of you.
Here are some self-care tips that may help you adjust to this new chapter of your life:
First and foremost, make sure to prioritize sleep. While it may be difficult to get a full night's rest with a newborn, try to nap when your baby naps or ask for help from a partner, family member, or friend to take turns caring for the baby during the night. Getting enough rest can help with mood and energy levels.
Another important aspect of self-care is nutrition. Make sure to eat a well-balanced diet and stay hydrated by drinking plenty of water. This can help with postpartum recovery and provide the necessary energy to care for your baby.
It is also important to make time for yourself and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. This can include taking a warm bath, practicing yoga or meditation, reading a book, or going for a walk. Taking care of yourself can help you feel more balanced and better equipped to handle the demands of parenting.
Remember, self-care looks different for everyone, so find what works best for you and don't be afraid to ask for help when needed. Congratulate yourself on this new journey and take time to appreciate the special moments with your new bundle of joy.
Set Realistic Expectations
Prior to having my first baby, I had this picture perfect idea of what motherhood would be like. I was going to be one of those moms who could do it all--work, keep a clean house, cook dinner every night, have a social life, work out regularly, etc.
Having a baby is a life-changing event that brings a lot of joy, but it can also bring some challenges. One of the biggest challenges that new parents face is adjusting to their new routine and the demands of caring for a newborn. Setting realistic expectations can help new parents manage their stress levels and enjoy their new roles as caregivers.
It is important for new parents to understand that caring for a newborn requires a lot of time and energy. Babies need to be fed every few hours, have their diapers changed frequently, and often require soothing when they cry. This can be exhausting, and it is important for new parents to take breaks when they can and ask for help when they need it.
It is also important to recognize that there is no "right way" to care for a baby. Every baby is different, and what works for one family may not work for another. New parents should trust their instincts and do what feels right for them and their baby.
Finally, it is important to remember that it is normal to feel overwhelmed or anxious at times. It can take time to adjust to life with a newborn, and it is important to be kind to yourself and take things one day at a time. With patience, support, and realistic expectations, new parents can navigate the challenges of caring for a newborn and enjoy the many joys that come with parenthood.
If you are struggling with Postpartum Depression or Anxiety Call or text 1-800-944-4773 (4PPD.) Hang in there! You are doing an amazing job and are the perfect mom for your baby.
